Let’s be honest: gay relationships are unique in ways that straight people sometimes don’t understand. So when should you, a man, ditch your boyfriend? Discover when you need to break it off.
1. It’s All About Him
You need to make sure his needs are met, emotionally, physically and otherwise. Perhaps you’ve found yourself being the house husband, waiting on him hand and foot. Maybe you’re always doing what he wants and spending time with his friends and family. Or you might find yourself doing everything he wants in bed without him giving a second thought to what you want.
If your boyfriend is this selfish, you’re the only one who will think about yourself.
2. You’ve Stopped Talking
Or maybe you’ve never really communicated, but it wasn’t apparent when you were too busy stroking each other in the beginning of your relationship. But communication is necessary. You need to be able to talk about how you feel and be vulnerable with one another. Without communication, what kind of a relationship is it?
3. He Hides You
You might enjoy the time you spend together, but he’s not ready to make it Facebook official. We get it. Coming out is hard. He might not even have come out to his friends and family. If it’s important to you to live an authentic life, however, you’ll need to consider whether you can live like this while he works through his baggage.
4. He’s Too Clingy
Maybe you’re his first since he came out or he’s insecure because an ex cheated on him. Either way, he’s clingy. He wants to be with you all the time, never lets you enjoy time with your friends and hounds you with messages when you do have a few moments alone. Who can live like that?
5. You Never Argue
Although it seems like a relationship is better without fighting, it might just be that you’re not committed enough to admit and work through your real issues. Eventually, one of you will feel enough resentment that you’ll find yourself hating your boyfriend or you’ll find yourself not caring about him at all. Maybe you’re already there!
6. You Always Argue
On the flip side, fighting at all the time isn’t any better. You might not know how to communicate well. The two of you may never really listen to each other, and you rely on steamy sex to “make up.” But the fights are never solved, so you’re always five minutes away from the next blowup.
7. He Won’t Move In
It doesn’t matter if you’re gay or straight. When you’re in a committed relationship, you want to share a life. This means moving in together or at least making plans for it. If he never wants to move forward, then you need to consider what you’re getting out of this relationship.
8. He Spends All His Time with His Phone — And Won’t Let You See
We’re not saying that you should share the same phone. In fact, who wants to do that? But if he’s glued to his phone, he might be on Grindr or looking for a hookup. And if he won’t let you look at his phone, he’s probably got something to hide.
9. It’s Only Sex
It can be hard to be a gay man who wants commitment. But you deserve that if it’s what you want. If you’re only having sex and never touching on anything deeper — no matter how deep you go — then it’s not really a relationship. Sooner or later, you’ll need to cut your losses.
10. Someone Cheated
There are people who say that cheating isn’t something to leave your boyfriend for. After all, the gay community sometimes seems like it’s all about sex. But if your relationship is struggling, you’re not communicating and lying is so commonplace that you don’t even bother reacting to another lie, then why would you stay through cheating?
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