Rough Sex! What is it? Can you go too far?


As society progresses, different types of sex, fetishes, and kinks are being accepted, but something that is still in the shadows is rough sex. Rough sex has always been around and has taken place between plenty of partners all around the world, but it is still considered taboo or wrong by many cultures. Most critics of rough sex haven’t done proper research or have heard horrific stories about rough sex going too far.

Rough sex is any sexual act that is vigorous or involves pain. Common activities within rough sex is slapping, spitting, choking, hair pulling, or even biting.

The people who partake in these activities do so because they are aroused by being rough with their sexual partner. The person who enjoys being roughed up in bed do it only because it turns them on. Being choked or slapped or spit on can be exhilarating. For the person who is doing the slapping and choking, it can be empowering.

Rough sex can bring a couple closer together because of the amount of trust involved in the act. Communication is a must for a couple having rough sex. There needs to be clear boundaries for what each person is happy with and what they are uncomfortable with.

A safe word is key to rough sex. Make it something both partners will remember easily so as soon as it is said all acts stop. “red” is a common safe word but feel free to mess around with it.

There are many levels to rough sex and every person will have a different definition of what is rough for them. For some, rough sex is just some ass-slapping, while others will go to the extreme with choking and spitting.


It is possible for rough sex to go too far. This is why having clear boundaries, safe words, and plenty of communication is vital to rough sex. If you are with someone and it does go too far and you feel unwanted pain, there is a few things you can do.

If you think it was an accident, talk to the person about it and see how they respond. If you think it was on purpose, get that person out of your life. There is no reason for people who disregard boundaries in life no matter the situation.

If you have talked to the person who was too rough and they continue to violate your boundaries, you should get that person out of your life as well.

Rough sex can be super exciting and fun as long as there is communication involved. If you are interested in rough sex talk with your partner and be open.

As always, feel free to contact us with any questions about rough sex.

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