What do most people say is one of the sexiest things about another person? It’s confidence. Confidence helps you talk to strangers, initiate sex and stand up for yourself, but it’s not easy to come by.
Eye contact is important to coming off as confident. If you can’t meet someone’s gaze, you might seem insecure or even rude. You can also creep someone out of seem awkward if you gaze lingers too long try. Try this: make eye contact long enough to notice the color of the other person’s eyes (assuming there is light enough to do so).
Smiling can also reflect your inner confidence as well as happiness. Someone who is insecure or unsure isn’t likely to smile genuinely. They might flash a nervous smile, but it’s easy to tell the difference. It might sound silly, but practicing your smile in the mirror is helpful. Of course, you shouldn’t smile all the time, so make a point to keep your face relaxed when you’re not smiling. If you’re the type who accidentally scowls by default, also known as “Resting bitch face,” you might be scaring off the very people you want to approach you.
A genuine laugh, a glimmer in your eye and the boldness to simply walk up to someone who looks interesting and start a conversation are all signs that you’re truly confident and comfortable in your skin. Whether you’re a man woman, straight, gay or something in between, that confidence will attract potential suitors to you.
Body language is also important to portray yourself as confident. If you hunch or otherwise try to hide or minimize your body, others won’t see you as confident. Stand tall with correct posture. You might learn casually against a counter or wall (think of the way James Dean does it). Avoid fidgeting with your hair, bouncing your leg, or other tics that give away your lack of confidence.
To some extent, you can imitate those people who are confident, and this can be helpful as you work on building your own confidence. But you don’t want to do that forever. If you’re busy concentrating on acting confident, you can actually come off as anxious.
True confidence comes within. Being confident means you know you’re worthy of love, time and attention. You feel secure in who you are and can show that to the world. If you’re surrounded by people who make you doubt those things, you might need to distance yourself from them to feel confident. Otherwise, gather those people who value you close and listen to why they love and respect you. Remind yourself of the ways that you’re awesome and unique. Really drill it into your head until it sticks!
If you don’t feel particularly attractive, it might be time to buy something new for your wardrobe. A snazzy blazer or dress can make you feel like you’re walking on cloud 9. If you love it, it will show! Similarly, a new haircut or color can do wonders for your confidence, or you might get a makeover at a makeup counter. Prospective lovers or partners will likely see you before they have a chance to get to know you, and the knowledge that you’re putting your best foot forward helps you be confident.
Sometimes the things that other people can’t see can also help you feel confident. For example, a sexy slip, bra and panty set or bustier worn beneath clothing can make your skin tingle and give your confidence a needed boost! Bonus points if you get to strip down and show someone later in the night. For men, lingerie options are lacking. However, a cock ring (contact us for help picking the right one) or size trainer might do the trick.
What makes people feel confident differs. It could be something like lipstick of a fresh shave or hearing a compliment from a friend or coworker. Discover what works for you and build on it, so you can walk into a room and feel brave enough to talk to the hottie in the corner!